Negotiation expert: Lessons from my horse

8 CQ

Co-author of Getting (More of) What You Want, award-winning researcher and management professor Margaret Neale admits she doesn’t always take her own advice. In an honest talk about her personal experience, and based on her philosophy that “you can’t force someone to say yes,” Neale explains why her horse, Sal, may be the best reminder that successful negotiation is not a battle.

Aired May 24, 2016

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Jennifer K
Good lesson, but I'm struggling with how to apply it. For instance, how would you change asking your boss for a raise from a win-lose distributed bargain into a win-win cooperative bargain? It seems like that situation is impossible to negotiate in any way but win-lose. And then you often lose, as the boss has all the power in that scenario.
Beth M
Well, your boss is paying you so you are making some contribution. So how can you help your boss and your company reach their next goal or next milestone with your contribution. Can you do what you're doing differently? Do more of it? But you need to have a clear understanding of what your company is reaching for. In Dr. Neale's case, Sal wanted more reassurance and confidence in order to focus on learning the dance steps. So Dr. Neal shifted her game a bit, and that allowed Sal to shift hers.
Chris R
Agree with previous reply. At worst if that doesn't work, get yourself out there with the assistance of recruiters to find another position that will provide you what you're looking for since current is not (at least in pay). Then use that as leverage to get a counter-offer from your current employer to stay. If they truly value you and can support the added cost they'll try to keep you. If not, you'll have the chance to succeed elsewhere in something that better meets your expectations.
Chris R
As Stephen Covey says: win-win-or no deal can be the only way. If you can't come to terms, be okay with walking away. Obviously walking away from a job is easier when you have an alternate offer already. So do your due diligence and go in prepared.
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